June 15 Update:

We will pick up this week in Proverbs chapter 15.  

Proverbs 14:4
"Where there are no oxen, the feeding trough is empty, but an abundant harvest comes through the strength of an ox."

The literal:
Imagine a farmer. If the farmer own no oxen, then his barn will stay cleaner. There's no manure, feeding costs, labor to care for the animal, no broken fences, etc. Therefore the feeding trough in the barn is empty because there are no animals to care for.

If he gets an ox, his life will be messier. The ox eats, poops, requires attention, and does create work for him.  BUT that same ox can plow fields, pull heavy loads, and help produce a huge harvest for the farmer.  

So, it is essentially indicating that the very thing that creates inconvenience is often the thing that creates fruitfulness. Many humans want the benefit without the burden.

 harvest without oxen
 children without sleepless nights
 growth without discomfort
 relationships without misunderstandings

The "framework" of this verse simply asks:
"Is the mess attached to something valuable?"
If yes, don't throw away the ox just because you don't like the manure.

The proverb doesn't say ignore the mess, though.
It says: Don't evaluate the ox only by the mess it creates. Evaluate it by the harvest it produces.

Spiritually, when I think of it and apply the framework:
A human may have a very tidy life philosophy (fewer questions, fewer sacrifices, and even fewer convictions), then Jesus comes and suddenly there is repentance, pruning, surrender, new convictions, and growth.
"The barn gets messy" but the harvest is abundant.

14:10

"The heart knows its own bitterness and no outsider shares in its joy"

This verse has "2 parts" but the overall meaning is expressing how there are parts of our inner world that only WE fully experience.
When with other humans (both in giving and receiving) it needs to be understood that we can listen, empathize, support, and/or celebrate, but we will never be able to completely step inside another humans heart to experience what they do.

"The heart knows its own bitterness..."
There are sorrows that only you truly understand. No one else feels it exactly the same.

Personal example:
Someone may know that I am autistic, but they dont fully know how confusing certain social interactions can become. Only my heart knows that bitterness completely.

"...and no outsider shares in its joy."
The same is true of joy!

Someone may be happy in response to something, but they wont always know the fears carried, the prayers that led to that day, the relief, and what it meant in our relationship with Jesus.

Others are but a witness to our hearts experience, but God understands you completely. There is NEVER a moment when God is standing outside your heart trying to guess what is happening inside.

He knows:
the bitterness before you even try to explain it,
the joy before you attempt to describe it, the tears before they even fall, and the reasons behind reactions you can't even articulate.

Personally, since I struggle to find the exact words for what is happening internally, that can be a tremendous comfort.

14:20
We noted that this was an observation on human behavior & society tends to marginalize others

14:30
"A tranquil heart is life to the body, but jealousy is rottenness to the bones."

In Bobbie's Bible, instead of tranquil it said "peaceful heart" and instead of "jealousy" it said "envy". Which is interesting because jealousy & envy are 2 different things (both not good & rooted in fear, according to psychology).

Jealousy: is a fear of losing something you already have or a fear of abandonment and often involves 3 or more people.

Envy: is wanting what someone else has and is based on a feeling of inadequacy. It comes to the surface when you covet another humans possessions, achievements, traits, etc.

• Fun fact, though: In traditional theology and scripture, envy is inherently sinful because it is the resentment of another person's blessings, while jealousy is a neutral emotion that describes the desire to protect what is rightfully yours.

Envy is wanting what isn’t yours: It is a desire to possess what someone else has (like their success, talents, or possessions) and often includes the wish that they be deprived of it. It is considered one of the seven deadly sins because it fundamentally denies charity, breeds bitterness, and rejects contentment with what you have been given.

Jealousy is protecting what is yours: It can be a protective, positive emotion. Such as wanting to guard a loyal relationship, or a commitment to preserving something that rightfully belongs to you. In fact, the Bible often describes God as a "jealous God" because He is protective of His exclusive relationship with humanity. Jealousy only crosses the line into sin when it becomes rooted in insecurity, possessiveness, or suspicion. If jealousy stems from an envious desire to control others or causes you to resent the blessings of your peers, it becomes a destructive force.

So, personally, this is why I question and find that it can be overused and unnecessary to make statements like, "You are just jealous", "stop being so jealous", etc. Especially when it comes to my children. It's important to ask myself first, if perhaps I am displaying a behavior or off balance a little within myself or priorities & the response/ behavior/ words from my kids is a fair reminder of them just responding to what is rightfully theirs.

I am their mom & I am not going anywhere. At the same time, children can be tricky because their brains are still developing and learning to communicate, and part of that development is an emotional roller-coaster for them. I am not inside their little bodies and can't always tell if we are entering a meltdown or developmental milestone...BUT you know what?  It doesn't matter because I'm all in for both & their little bodies calm down as soon as I give them a hug or hold them & remind them that I love them.

Sometimes, one child will come over and want "squeezes & mama snuggles" & the other will start to run up and join in. Inevitably, someone says, "Oh, look! Here comes, Mr./Ms. Jealous!"  Or Elara may slowly walk over to me with her shy grin, asking if there's enough room because she's turning into a big kid & my response has always joyfully been:

"Its all good. I have two arms for a reason."