Wave Pool
Baby Girl,
Yesterday when you met with your ministry partner, she had some sharp words of rebuke for you. What was that about?
I told her about the thoughts and feelings I had towards one of the pastors, and then how well that book delivery ended up going. When she started her rebuke, I thought, “I’m telling you this because I already know that my thinking is off,” but immediately, You hushed me in my soul so that I could really listen.
I needed to hear it, and to feel the weight of her eyes as she said it. Not because she is my friend and ministry partner, but because she is my sister who you put in a place of spiritual authority in my life. That conversation was the shepherd's hook gently redirecting me.
This morning, as I reflect on the rod of correction, and the staff of redirection, I feel like yesterday was another shovel of dirt out of the hole, digging deeper into the truth of what that means. She just represents You in those moments and I’m grateful for the redirection without the need for the rod of correction.
My heart has been off about that pastor. I was aware of that and talking to You about it but I didn’t realize that I was allowing thoughts about myself and my place in these assignments that were not in alignment with Yours.
I guess I did feel a little bit like a stalker with some of these pastors, particularly this one.
Look up the definition of that word.
Stalker = a person who harasses or persecutes someone with unwanted and obsessive attention
The “harasses and persecutes” part has never fit but I have often given particular people obsessive and unwanted attention. People who didn’t like me, and I was trying to win them over, or people who I really wanted to have in my life but I felt unworthy to have them in my life.
I guess when I saw the look of fear and almost terror in that pastor's eyes, I felt like he saw me as a stalker.
Why were you repeatedly showing up at his church?
You gave me a mission: to put that book into his hands and pray with him.
Why did you not just mail the book to him?
I considered it but ever since that pastor said, “If the LORD told you to put the book into the hands of the pastor, don’t you think it would benefit you to wait for the pastor?” I took that as a direct word from You.
So if you were not harassing or persecuting him, but were simply showing up on a mission from Me, do you see how the use of that word was inappropriate?
I do now.
The problem is not people-pleasing or concern about what people are thinking. The problem is that you have not decided to agree with Me.
About what?
What just came to mind?
“What I ask of you is simple if you simply obey, so tuck your soul away and obey.”
Personalize it and declare it right now.
What God asks of me is simple when I simply obey, so I am choosing to consciously tuck my soul away, give up my right to think and feel about these assignments, and I am going to simply obey.
Do you mean that?
I want to.
What is that? You want to, what is that?
My will.
Are you going to hang onto that? Are you going to give up the right to your thoughts and feelings but hang onto your will?
…
Little One, that is impossible. It is absolutely and unequivocally impossible. You cannot… you do not have the ability in your soul to choose to forgo your thoughts and feelings unless you also lay down your will. Your will influences your thoughts and feelings. Your will, which could also be described as your desires or your wants, your hopes, your dreams, your plans… your will. I’m not going to ask if you are willing to lay that down. Your will has nothing to do with it - you must choose.
Giving up your right to your hopes, your dreams, your plans, your desires, your wants… that is not an act of the soul. It is a choice you make from your spirit. Period. When, from your spirit, you declare that you are done allowing your desires to inform your thoughts and your feelings, you are prepared to take on My will.
You are on day three of a 21-day fast. You have asked Me to help you get your life in order. You have been, for two years now, asking Me to help you get your life in order. Your obedience reminds Me of the wave pool at Kings Island.
The water is calm and nothing is happening for five or ten minutes. You’re just hanging out. Out of nowhere, a loud buzzer begins to sound an alarm. Slowly, little ripples start to come until the whole pool is filled with large waves causing everyone in the pool to bob up and down and thrusting people in their little floats towards the edge of the pool.
Like clockwork, the machine slows down, the waves die down, and the water becomes still again.
Every time we have one of these conversations, you make a new mental declaration that whatever we talked about, you’re going to change. You make a lot of waves moving in the direction of that change and eventually the waves slow down and the water becomes still. You stop acting on what you know is right.
Your ministry partner encouraged you to have a vision board; to look at the things that we have talked about, the places that we’re headed, MY dreams that we’ve discussed.
I want one thing on your vision board until this fast is over… technically, two.
I want you to print a picture of a wave pool with no waves. And then I want you to print a picture of the ocean.
My desire is not that your obedience would wax and wane like a wave pool but that your obedience would be steady and consistent like the ocean lapping against the shore. There will be times when the water will swell, when the tide will come in, and when it will go out but the waves, the action, the obedience, the movement in My direction is to never become stagnant.
Because your will is still involving itself, your thoughts and feelings are still out of alignment.
I’ve told you what to do with paperwork. I’ve told you what to do with books. I’ve told you what to do with pictures. I’ve told you what to do with your clothing. I’ve told you what to do with your schedule. I’ve told you what to do with your phone. I’ve told you what to do with media and social media. I’ve told you how to handle your interpersonal conflicts.
I have talked to you about how to eat and when to eat and why you should eat. I have talked to you about how to care for your children. I have talked to you about how to interact with your husband. I have talked to you about how to move your body. I have talked to you about every aspect of your life and, in many areas, we have talked multiple times.
Your problem is not ignorance; it is rebellion.
Rebellion does not have to look like a teenager with a lack of respect, anger, and talking back. Rebellion can be passively living life without conscious steps of obedience.
Rebellion can be as simple as FAILING to do what we have repeatedly discussed because your soul has decided it’s hard.
It’s not.
It’s not only simple, it’s easy.
What I ask of you is not hard. It is not complicated. It is not troublesome and it comes with peace.
Everyone around you will not innately agree with the actions you will take in obedience to Me but with your thoughts, feelings, and will out of the way, that should not trouble you.
Keep walking with Me.
Keep standing in truth.
Keep LOVING the unlovable.
The world has ALWAYS adjusted to your changes over time. The world around you will adjust over time as your obedience ceases to look like the wave pool.
Those in your world - and you - expect the break in the waves where you can be distracted from your mission and have your attention drawn away from your purpose.
The wave pool CANNOT maintain a steady flow forever because it is manmade mechanical parts causing the waves. Those machines MUST rest.
The waves of the ocean CANNOT stop because it is My power and authority that keeps them rolling out and rolling in. Unless I cease to keep the world in motion, those waves CAN’T help but come in and go out.
When you TRULY surrender your will, obedience will become like the ocean. It won’t be your human soul doing all the work. You will naturally, from your spirit, keep in rhythm with Mine.
Meditate on this for the remainder of your fast.
I LOVE you with an everlasting LOVE,
Daddy
Luke 6:46-49